I used to love giving advice. Now I’m trying to give less of it.

For awhile now people have come to me for advice, be it about relationships, work, family, or whatever they were unsure about or struggling with at that time. “You seem to have your shit together,” is something I’ve heard from others in the past. It was likely due to a combination of what they thought of me and what I wanted them to think of me.

I rarely said no when they’d ask. Even if I didn’t have my shit together. I liked it. They were coming to me in their time of need so I felt like I couldn’t…

This is not me and no I am not.

By the way, this is the third time I’m writing this entry. I noticed the first two attempts fell a bit flat at addressing why I wasn’t fluent in Spanish yet. I don’t know if I was making excuses or explaining. I don’t know if it makes a difference.

My Spanish partner is fluent in English so we’ve always spoken in English. My intensive Spanish class got interrupted due to the pandemic and the new one wasn’t as enjoyable with the limited student interactions and reduced number of in-person classes. …

For years I told the story. Then I talked to my mom and realized I’d made it up.

Dig if you will the picture of a seven-year-old me. A recent immigrant to the United States. Not being able to speak English. On the school bus in the morning. I can’t understand what the students are saying. But their scrunched-up faces combined with the universal hand waving gesture in front of their noses signals to me that they find something to be stinky.

Then suddenly the kid sitting next to me shouts out “Ewwwww!”, points to my lunch box, and pretends to throw up. All the kids point at me while pinching their nostrils. Ewwwwwwwww. …

and why do so many of us think that unwillingness to change is a good character trait?

I work on a sports interview podcast with Jori Davis, an American professional basketball player overseas and I’m always nervous about booking a male athlete because they tend to be more boring and generic compared to their female counterparts.

Maybe it’s because the men live alone and their life often consists of basketball, video games, Netflix, parties, groupies, and ordering food. Whereas the female players often have roommates, cook for themselves and each other, explore their teams’ cities and the surrounding areas as well as the neighboring countries.

Typically, a male interviewee will tell you about a tough time in…

while they cut me in line at the supermarket

The old ladies in Spain had me on superalert mode when I first arrived here.

To be fair, it wasn’t just the old ladies. The older men would cut me in line too. It happened at bakeries where I could never figure out if there was a line or not.

I would just kind of stand around hoping that the person behind the counter had been keeping track of who arrived when and that they would call me when it was my time.

Which most of the time, they did. But there were a handful of other times when they…

What do we owe those from our past who pop up and drop one on us?

At one point in my life, I saw both of them almost every day. They still exist in some of the best and worst memories of my life. Moments that brought out the best in me and the worst in me. Possibly out of each other.

They both DMed on IG. About two years apart. The first one, I didn’t open for almost a year. I saw he’d written and I just let it sit there. It was hard for me not to open it.

I told a mutual friend that I was afraid of what the message might contain…

and how I feel guilty for not liking it and if I should always be rooting for everyone Asian

I can’t think of a movie I’ve wanted to like as much as I wanted to like “Minari.”

My family immigrated to Ithaca, a college town in upstate New York, in 1984. Like the family in the movie, we too are a family of four, with a son and daughter (except I’m the elder). My parents also moved to Little Rock, Arkansas (in 2010). The movie starred Steven Yeun, who in my eyes is the best Korean American actor working today. It was written and directed by Lee Isaac Chung, a Korean American. Plus it was produced by A24.


and his death, our reaction to it, and my feelings about those things

If you’re a fan of DMX you already know everything about him. By now, you’ve likely read the stream of tributes that have come out since his passing last week. I wasn’t even sure if I should write anything about it. What the hell would I have to add? I’ve never even met the guy. I did have a funny incident with him and a bathroom at his birthday party back in the day.

I’ll be honest, I wasn’t a big fan of DMX’s music when it came out. I was slowly emerging from my underground hip hop backpack days…

I took someone’s AirPods.

It was about a month ago. I went with my lady and a couple of folks to celebrate a birthday (not mine) at a restaurant. As I exited the car I looked down and saw the AirPods in the case on the floor of the parking lot. I picked them up. My first thought was that someone had dropped them while exiting their car parked next to us. I noticed the car was a rental.

I announced to the group that I’d found them and that I was planning to turn them into the restaurant to…

This is what I hope my newsletter to be

First, welcome and thanks.

As for this thing? Well, I’ve had some thoughts. But they kept changing. I kept waiting for the perfect idea. What will this be about? What will my first post be about? I’d kind of forgotten that I had this. I would get an occasional subscriber and I’d be like, how’d that happen?

John, Phillip Annand’s father, of all people, signed up for a paid subscription. I told my lady. She was like, well now you have to start it.

So here we go.

Thanks John.


Hyun Kim 김현

Writer/Editor: Vibe, MTV, Tidal. Marketing/Advertising: Nike, Samsung, The Madbury Club. Former #1 Google image search for bald Asian. Seoul->Ithaca->NYC->VLC

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